Sometimes people will piss me off until the point that I want to crush them until their bones crumble and pierce their flesh. I want them to suffer pain from every nerve until the point where it overwhelms their brain and it shuts down.

Unfortunately my mind eventually concludes that it's unrealistic.

Fuck I'm pissed off... I want to smash something....................... No, I don't need anger management. If I needed that I probably wouldn't be here right now.

Bills to pay after going to the states last month plus I have to pay for stupid school tuition. In 2 months I will be in school and have absolutely no income, which is absolutely ridiculous. I don't know if I can cope since I work 40+ hours a week and then I have to take 2 months off for school. I really don't know if I can adjust my spending habits.

Angela went to China for 2 months for field school so I'll be bored for quite some time. Hoping to go overkill with my work out routine. I really want to slay the grouse grind this year. Maybe read some more books and revamp my fish tank. Poor fish, having to swim around in stale water for the past year. There's a reason I bought the most expensive canister pump, so that I won't have to clean as much and the water stays crystal clear. I'll see if I can actually get out and go to Toast Masters again this year, on a weekly basis.

I'm poor and I need to save... But spending is fun.

I was browsing the interweb today and discovered something amazing...

http://www.starcraft2.com/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJB-Z54R61s

I had two very interesting Belgium beers today. Tripel Karmeliet was a
very fragrant beer that was pleasing to the senses; very citrusy and
light. Belle-Vue Kriek had a very sweet cherry flavor with a touch of
malt; practically like a dessert. I prefer beer over wine and not cheap
beer either, since I prefer not to drink piss water. Although, I cannot
speak for everyone.

1. People climbing 20-30+ ft. up trees for fruits like mangoes, santols, and coconuts. Fuck, I really miss santols and I can never seem to find a shop that sell them here! It's an apple sized fruit with a giant seed inside, while the fruit is sweet whitish pulp. I heard that the seeds are poisonous if you eat them and even more surprisingly WTF eats seeds that are 3 inches in diameter? WTF!
2. Digging up raw peanuts out of the earth and eating them was fun aswell.
3. Poisonous centipedes smashed to bits by rocks.
4. Men of all ages peeing anywhere they please.
5. Having to take tons of weird pills, because I was sick somehow.
6. Clinging for my life with one hand off the rail of a tricycle (motorcycle type of taxi) with my body hanging off it. Some how after school I managed to fall out. I almost died. I even forgot to pay after being so scared.
7. Street vendors selling juice in bags made out of dirty water and powder. You could really see dirt floating around in those bags.
8. Plastic balloons. You get a tube of toxic glue-like chemicals and a straw, pump out all the stuff on the end of the straw and blow it up. The sticky stuff will dry and it's done!
9. One day, on the way to school I found a dead cat on the curb. It was pretty obvious that it had been run over. Ants were feasting all over it; so, just imagine a kitty covered in ants. To make the story even more depressing I'll point out that one of it's little kitty friends was standing 3 feet away, staring and meowing. It looked really sad. Dead cat and cat's friend mourning dead cat. Sad.

1. I remember getting beaten a lot and woke up a couple times being
   suffocated with a pillow by my cousin even though he was one of the
   only kids I hung out with over there back in the day.
2. Stored many prize fighting spiders in a matchbox. In the school washroom, kids would sell and fight spiders against each other upon a stick. The loser dies! For some reason it was a really bad thing to do on school grounds; I wonder why.
3. My cousin (that I hated) held one of my spiders to inspect it and it bit him hard. Bingo!

When I was 9 years old I went to the Philippines for 4-6 months and attended a private school, meanwhile I encountered many eventful things which may explain how much more fucked my childhood was and how fucked I became.

1. Scorched ants with magnifying glasses.
2. Dripped burning hot plastic over the ants.
3. Played in many areas and trees, barefoot with ants that bite chunks out of your flesh and hurt like hell.
4. Dismembered "tiki's" or gecko tails with air soft pistol. Legs and tails grow regenerate! So, of course it's completely ethical to shoot them off and watch them wiggle for entertainment.
5. Butchered a dragonfly's wings and legs off with foldable scissors  after catching it from a grassy field. To this day I still feel bad about it, I like dragonflies.
6. Stomped a 4" long black hairy spider to death and watched all the babies crawl off their mommy's back and stomped them as well.
7. Stomped a colorful rainbow spotted spider to death. (The more colorful ones are more poisonous right?)
8. Watched my uncle spray a giant 1' long spider. It may of been bigger.
9. My uncle showed me his silver pistol and the rounds he hid in a sock. Apparently a large amount of males carry guns in the Philippines.
10. Some man went to pee in the bushes and got bit by a snake, he snapped its neck and gave it to my cousin to preserve in formaldehyde. She preserved various other animals in jars for some unknown reason.
11. Assisted in killing a rooster for dinner. (I held the feet upside down as someone cut it's neck open) On someone's birthday the blood is saved to place on their forehead.
12. My aunt forced me to play with a dead bird with it's head hanging from the torso that my cousin freshly killed with a sling. She insisted that its "what boys should do."

My left eye has been involuntarily twitching for the past four days and it's starting to piss me off. Maybe, just maybe I can make some people uncomfortable when they see my twitchy eye and give off the aura of a complete psycho like in TV... or not. It gets really annoying and distracting. In the worst situation some sort of larvae will pop out and say "HELLO, your eye = my food!"

Starting to draw everywhere I go. On the sky train I'll draw people's shoes to pass time and I find it hilarious when they notice that I'm drawing and glancing over to them every once in a while. Need to buy more discount print/art books.

In Seattle we played a game in china town called take a picture with a Chinese person since they're a rare commodity down there. (Compared to Vancouver anyways, since Asian people are everywhere over here) So what you do in the game is stand next to or behind a Chinese person and the cameraman/woman discreetly walks by and snaps a shot, then we all walk away.