March 28, 2007

• I’m on the brink of being ill. I’ve been pretty healthy all month and suddenly this morning at work I notice that there’s some weird crap in my lungs when I cough. I feel so-so, right now, but I’m not sure how long it’ll be until I either get better or worse. At work, a lot of weird shit floats around in the air such as random dust and chemicals. I’m going to eat 10 dumplings, 10 fishballs, a pack of noodles, and go nap for a couple hours. Echinacea, yay… I hate being sick and for some reason my body wants to work out even more even though there’s simply no energy left.

  A lot of the times I feel as if I’ve wasted much of my life. From age 19 to early twenties is supposed to be the physical prime, while age 23 is supposed to be the prime mentally. I have no real ambitions, no hobbies or skills. After mid-twenties, could it be really downhill? By that age a person had all the chances in the world to complete whatever goals. (ignoring financial obstacles.) I gotta push harder. When I die I want to feel like I did something with my life, enough to die laughing regardless of the situation.

  • 9:47 pm
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