Month: September 2003

  • I laugh during amusing moments.
    I laugh at things that don’t contain the slightest sliver of humour.
    I laugh when there’s nothing to laugh at.
    I laugh at the most surprising tragedy.
    I laugh when I hurt myself.
    I laugh when an individual speaks of the most idiotic joke ever to exist.
    I laugh when other’s hurt themselves.
    I laugh.
    I laugh not because it’s funny, but simply because…

    I CAN.

    Some people really need to lighten up, you only live once. If laughing can bring you happiness out of nothing, so be it. Simple things please simple minds. I’m not simple at all, I for one have an abstract mind.



    EDIT:


    #5 Kawada
    “I’m a survior, of this f*cking game.” – #5 Kawada

    Which Battle Royale Character are You?
    brought to you by Quizilla


  • <Bleh… RO is bad and good thing I promised to give up. Uninstalled. It’s sad to say that our guild leader was banned aswell. Rest in peace General Teo, he died for us. Arrogancy has made everything seem so boring… It’s not good to live alone>


    …Back to the real world, nothings new. I’m broke, well after I go eat out tonight that is. My mind is warped, from 10 hr sessions of RO. My self esteem has been purged from staying at home so much and being isolated from society.


    The picture to the left is me today, and yes I’m insane… Well, not quite there, I’m working on it. ;)



  • OMG, humans… and their wants, not needs… after living in a music-lacking world for the last little while I’ve been craving an MD or MP3 player. Due to financial problems I will be unable to attain one for the next little while. Sigh… I need a job, or more importantly money. I’m too lazy to go look for one at the moment.


    $120 a month
    -$40 bus pass
    -$60 hot lunch program
    -$40 other food/etc stuff.
    _______
    -$20? WTFUX.


    EDIT: Next week It’s going to be “clean” (No RO, no procrastinating), time to get my ass in gear. I’ll be working out every day except sundays. Strength on odd days, cardio or swimming on evens. I must get strong enough to be able to take some heavy hits after one year from now. Also, I really need to start putting a little more effort into school, which is yeah… Very easy, but still… I’m not satisfied. Satisfying myself through hard work is the only way to attain confidence… Regardless if I was born with the knowledge in my head or not.




  • If there was a course called “Nap Time” offered- I could take great use of it. For one, I’m addicted to RO again and it’s really hard to stop playing… 5 hours of sleep is not enough, I need my 10… =(


  • Geezus, yesterday my Dad bitched at me because I was a lazy bum and didn’t go out or buy some phone battery for the main house phone. Now, now… I came home at 7:00 PM with the battery and he already bought one today. -Plus! He’s like blah, blah… cannot use it for 24 hrs because battery needs full charge for it to work best. Agh, need my daily dosage, and the store stole my old crapass battery- bastards. And you’re saying it’s just a battery? I’m running low on cash, it’s 40$ outta MY wallet- AND, I got only 50$ left… -.-;;


    I bought weights on sunday, and today I wore them… It’s hard to get used to because the padding is quite thin. Iron bars, not rubber iron- Solid iron. Damn It’s not comfortable, but if it can help me lower body strength, so be it!


    “T’is not he who can lift the most, it’s he who can take the most pain.”



  • Ugh… Chronic depression due to excessive digital influence. Why must I submit to the forbidden fruit? I gotta find a way to cut my self up…


    [Another post that makes no sense to anyone else but me.]


    Harakiri, Harakiri, Harakiri, Harakiri, Harakiri… Wait, no. I just noticed I Xanga only when I’m feeling like shit. Thanks, bye.



  • Click –> http://mi.aacdn.us/imporEracer/mkj.jpg
    Yesterday’s work… was bored, too bad the edges look a bit jaggy.


    On the bus… One thing that really brightened my rainy day was this girl… Usually I have a problem with making eye contact with people that i don’t know and look away after a split second, which i did.. but within a  10th of a second I looked back and maintained. It was as if I simply could not stop, I wish I had the power to smile. She’s changed so much since she was in my math last year… She was cute, now she’s absolutely gorgeous. Damn, I have never even talked to her once.


    ****Don’t read the following unless you want to…


    Pshh… I got alot of anger locked up deep down inside, luckily I am able to keep it within. I do my best to never, ever to get back into physical fights. In my younger days (geez that makes me sound old) I got into a good amount of fights, none of them satisfied me. No fighting for me, unless I would have to protect someone important to me, nevermind myself. (Influence, duhh… I stupid)


    Well, what I’m trying to get at is that some people can really piss me off. After school… I was sitting on the bus today and some stupid bitch was sitting behind me humming some country song shit and then she keeps mumbing very quietly to herself. Later when we stopped by where Templeton people get on the bus she kept mumbling to herself something which sounded like “fucking people, fucking kids, fucking…” and note some racial remarks of some sort.


    Ugh… Involuntarily I grasped my umbrella very tightly with anger, I was shaking with excitement. It seemed as if a demon locked within wanted to kill this woman. Some old man was looking at me, because I looked pretty angry. Gruesome thoughts rifled through my mind. Even at when I got off the bus I waited to be the last off. I just wanted to see what this hideous hag looked like, she was absolutely ugly… and old. Some people are ugly on the outside, and the inside. They should just fall over and die.



  • I LIKE SOMEONE… AND THAT’S ME, ME, ME!!
    I’m me, and I’m beginning to enjoy being who I am. Negative comments can no longer effect me. Except I do somehow accept constructive criticism and praise to some extent. I’m an artist, and unique in my own way. At times I may frighten people, for my strange behavior is no where close to normal. Otherwise, I keep it all within my quiet exterior. Deep down inside, I’m disgusting. Yet, it brings a smile upon my face to simply know… I have a sick sense of humor and enjoy pain to another extent. Lovely.//


    Today was today. The only highlight of the day was a bee flying into my hair in English. It visited briefly, also attracting attention. Stupid people, bees are living things aswell. They can be cute, even though their sting hurts. Hey, even larvae can be cute. But, comon… Bzzzz… When it left, I felt lonely.




  • There are some friends which you wish you didn’t have, some which you don’t really care about, some that you are glad that you have, and there are others – probably very few.. which you simply could not be without! The past week was rather depressing, but I feel alot better now, thanks to my best buddy ever! Tiff =D

    OAKAGYGtgEAGv.esf..g3eqy53yu64jw4s6s5t6shthrsta4$$#$%.sg.hs homework now, bye.

    My inner child is one year old today

    My inner child is one year old!

    Everything is new to me. I like watching the world
    go by around me, and I don’t sweat the small
    stuff–or the large stuff, either. Just so long
    as I stay warm and safe and dry, life’s pretty
    good.

    How Old is Your Inner Child?
    brought to you by Quizilla



  • Slept ’till 11:30 AM today, and worked out at 3:00 PM… gonna work out alot more now, until that day that I need my strength the most. Fighting spirit, weee… anime can really influence your life, whether it’s a good or bad thing.