August 7, 2003

  • I can’t concentrate very well, it’s so hot – even past sunset. I suppose this is why they call it summer. But the temperature is not the only reason for my disability to concentrate, I have a short attention span for these sort of things, such as studying. But, for once or twice I will try my best. I am never the overacheiver unless the project requires a massive amount of creativity or when it calls for the need of someone who thinks outside the box. I am me, the criminal mind.


    All these emotions blazing through my mind, I feel as if I am about to expload. I suppose this is what it is to be human. Sometimes I felt like crying throughout the day, I had my head downwards as people looked me in the eye, hah! I am the infamous stone statue, which can hide emotions of all sorts at the appropriate time – ehh, excluding my laughter perhaps. Why do I hunger for what cannot be? Impatience, I strive but the result is not definate. My calculations are too inferior compared to those who have a definate answer for the future. I shall remain indecisive, but will it help? I want her… And yet I always do something to mess up a situation – motive or not.


    “Money and property. Cars, jewels and lovers. Humans go on through life constantly stealing and losing important things. That’s the sort of helpless beings we are. When things like money and objects are taken from you, you just need to get them back. But if you lose your humanity or the friendship of others, it takes a kindred spirit to help you continue on.” – Master


    Well, now that I just spilled everything that was filtered on the table all that remains is what was not explained. It helped a bit, but I just can’t tell anyone ever. For, not even I really know… Psychology would help assist me in attaining the knowledge of what my mind is built up of, we shall see.



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